While cultivating positive mindsets are easy paths for leveraging them for a more effective and successful life, minimising negative mindsets which you possess are as vital in personal and professional development. In earlier articles, I had highlighted a few negative mindsets and had listed methods you can use to eliminate them. As the sun starts to set this month with 2025, experts have already started to highlight emerging trends in leadership and culture in the coming year. Focus on Emotional Quotient leadership is higher than ever before. Leaders are expected to use empathy as a major component in the way they lead, instead of a ‘I know everything so follow me’ dictator style behaviour, the young generation rather follow leaders who are enablers and coaches.
Actually, humans are wired to be selfish and self-centred so that each human being looks at their own needs, interest, good health and more. However, in simple words if your life is obsessed with three people in your life, which is I, me and myself, you will find yourself isolated while you will continue to progress based on your skills and differentiators. We all need other people to work with and achieve more even if you are a businessman and much more of you are a professional. Whether it is personal or professional, inclusivity, teamwork and mutual understanding will become critical ingredients that will define your success and happiness.
Love and care are trending in the world you live in. Your self-centeredness needs to ideally tone down in its intensity. But one important point here. Your transition has to be real. Fake is out. Being genuine is in!
Human beings today, in the world we live in
The pandemic was a game changer in perceptions and expectations from life, a time where nothing mattered. The houses or cars you owned or your bank balance. The whole world literally came to a standstill. For many it was science fiction coming to life. Life meant nothing, it was a long pause. Human values changed phenomenally. Post pandemic survivors woke up to a VUCA world a new world they started to live in where it was endlessly volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous. Selfishness went up initially with revenge shopping, spending savings, no one knew when everything would stop again and for how long. Then, emotions came in big time. There is still competition, work politics are rife and life is not really fare, however human emotion has become king.
How does one move beyond the Obsessive Self-Focussed mindset?
You need to first measure your selfishness meter. Gauge yourself. Compare yourself to others you know. As an intelligent person you will surely get a hang of the degree of your own selfishness. Ratify your findings by talking to a range of others. Of course, you cannot go and ask people directly “Am I very selfish” (The exception being your closest family of course). So make it a small bunch of questions. Ask about your level of empathy, belief in teams, inclusivity, attitude etc. Believe me you will surely get a broad idea. Now comes your honest evaluation and summary. If you discover that you need to become less selfish, you will need to draw up a practical action plan with milestones. Letting go of selfishness is a very difficult task. You will need to be slow but steady. Also monitor your positive changes. You will see visible results
Key benefits of being less selfish
Only monks can be completely unselfish. The whole purpose of this mindset repair is to get you better accepted in the world today. Some benefits you will see and feel may include
- Better and easier fit in today’s world as a human being and leader
- Lesser stress as you come out of your isolated selfish seclusion
- Increased HQ (Happiness Quotient) and therefore a big step towards being your best self
Above all greater acceptability with people, creation of deep and solid relationships.
And.. there is much more!
“A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.” — Ben Franklin
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