When I was in my first job, I wanted to be CEO by 30 (because my then-CEO was 33 and I wanted to do it faster than him). I wanted a bigger house and a bigger car than him. All my dreams were about being faster, better, and bigger. I was constantly comparing and wanting more.
30 years later, my definition of faster, bigger, and better has changed.
To me, an abundance mindset lets go of the need for more. The shift from “I need more, more, more… to “What is enough?” This is what growth feels like for me. I do believe that nature shows us that we must keep growing. Nature does show us the circular and cyclical pattern of growth. I keep having to remind myself of this paradox. Growth is sometimes about the small things; it’s about reinvention and remaining rooted in reality.
Ticking the boxes. Vs. What makes me tick? This shift from going through the motions, managing the optics, and showing off to showing up as myself is growth.
My individuality and my interconnectedness. My significance and my insignificance are all bundled together to make me and my journey special and unique.
Sometimes the bigger deal is the smaller moments. A small moment that sparked joy for me last week was receiving a WhatsApp message from my son. It was just one line “Saw this and thought of you” along with this picture of a chocolate I love – the crunchie. My parents many years ago after a trip to Australia arrived back in Chennai with a suitcase full of goodies. One in particular – the violet crumble, was a super special memory from my childhood. The crunchie is pretty similar and probably what makes it special for me.
Not a particular sentimental message. No grand gesture or elegant prose. And yet it touched a chord deep down in me. It told me that I have a special place in his mind and heart. A connection that came from my parent’s trip to Australia when I was a child and now went all the way to America. In the middle if his little shopping expedition he remembered me. More importantly, he took the time and effort to take the picture and send it to me.
To be remembered is a gift. A gift that can be given and received with gratitude. Inspired by this insight, I sent a message to someone that I had been thinking about. So, here is me inviting you to do the same. Send a message to someone you remember. Not later. Right now. A small act that could be the biggest gift for them (or not).
The big dreams. The big bold proclamations of love. They have their place. But to me, I am now realising it’s the many small ones that are a bigger deal. In the world of reputation, a similar insight emerges. Big bold campaigns. Big crises and how they are handled. Both have their place. But the real power is in the discipline and the process of the everyday. The in between moments all add up to the bigger picture. How a customer complaint is handled. How a difficult question in a town hall is navigated. How the departure of employees is treated. So many small incidents that tell the real story. The consistency and integrity with which a company acts in everyday moments of truth is where a real reputation is built.
In coaching too, there are big breakthrough moments and powerful questions that have their special place. However, it’s the moments of silence that allow a client to process and feel what has emerged that often offer them a chance to see what needs to be seen. The space in between sessions when an insight grows from a seed of thought to a sapling of action. One small step forward in the right direction, that is in alignment with their being. The process of seeking deeper self-awareness on an ongoing basis, not just in moments of crisis or opportunity, is a series of small but meaningful steps. The regular investment in growing oneself is about honouring the process. Building good habits and rituals that hold my hand through life.
Sometimes the bigger dream is actually the smaller one. Work and life keep reminding me that the small things are the big ones.
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