In my last article titled ‘Hey, watch out, I’m impulsive’ I explained how we are essentially hard wired about some things that we cannot rewire. These come from our genes and actually make us what we basically are known as. It is called human nature. We live our lives learning from the time we are born. We learn to walk, talk etc but essentially become the person we are through our core nature that we are born with. Having a short fuse temper is a negative trait which is very stubborn. People with anger management issues take therapy lessons and try to change themselves but actually, the short fuse gets thicker, but does not go away, however much one tries.
It’s also called tripping or loosing one’s shirt! The worst consequence is if one gives into the fuse, ignores it and lets anger flame up. As we all know, anger completely takes over your mind and body. Cortisol, adrenaline and other harmful chemicals get injected into our body system as it recognises anger to be a fight or flight syndrome. This damages you big time. Your digestive system goes for a complete toss. Your blood pressure shoots up, your heart starts beating fast. You cordially invite cardio vascular diseases, diabetes and other long-term life-threatening diseases to live in your body!
It affects your balance and decision-making abilities. You blurt out hurtful words which damage relationships at work and in your personal space, sometimes for ever. Your mental health eventually deteriorates.
You try to change your mindset but your short fuse temper just blows. So, what do you do?
Identify your temper fuse blowers
You will need someone you believe in to help you identify your temper fuse blowers. But never blow your temper fuse at this person! You really need to list out what the reasons and issues are that you just cannot tolerate basically and your temper goes out of control. Just awareness of these issues will help create sub conscious vigil. But you will need to recognise the vigil signals and take them immediately into account so that you can control them. Just imagine them to be like the bright red light signals atop tall buildings and structures which the pilots surely notice out of the corner of their eyes in their flight landing paths. You just need to enable yourself to see these signals and consciously take action.
Learn the art of stress management
Anger, loosing one’s temper and even road rage comes to us with the stress we meet during our normal day. As I often say in my column the VUCA world we live in often pushes us to our danger zones of livelihood threats, weather change related issues, global uncertainty and volatility developments, etc. Today’s stress levels are much higher especially after the pandemic. Values have changed, human relationships have mostly become transactional. Happiness experts are laughing themselves to the bank but we are all laughing much lesser. Stress management techniques are simple to learn but difficult to follow as it needs a complete mindset evolution, but if the resolve to implement these techniques in you are strong you can really make great progress.
Balance life with happiness
We try our best to create the magic world of work-life balance. We say I am in my work mode and then we say that now I am in my personal mode, and we try to keep these worlds separate. We do not realise two things. One, the maximum time in our life is spent in office with our colleagues. We spend more time at work than at our homes, yet are happy staying plastic and aloof. The second is that whether at work or at play you are the same human being essentially! The more you enjoy yourself as days of your valuable life goes bye and the more you seek and give happiness, your stress and anger issues will vanish.
They hate happiness!
“A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough” Bruce Lee
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