The gift of a rescheduled flight

The holiday had finished too fast as usual. My son was all set to head back to the US of A and then the unexpected happened. I was working from home on his last day with us, as I wanted to savour a lunch break with him and help him with any last-minute packing which has become something that we typically do together. I grumble about it but secretly enjoy fussing over him and the feeling of being needed and important in his life.

Lunch was done, the suitcase fully loaded, big decisions like which books to take and which to leave behind were made, and I was back on a Teams Call counting down the hours when out of the corner of my eye I noticed him look in to check if I was free (this is unusual). Normally it is me knocking on his door checking if I can steal a few minutes with him. I was speaking so I did not engage with him. A few minutes later I noticed him hovering around again. I excused myself for a minute from the meeting, put my camera off muted the microphone, and asked him “What’s up Neil? All okay?”. He looked worried but simply said, “When you finish will you come to my room…”

A few tense minutes later, when my meeting ended, I quickly made my way to his room. He was sitting in front of his desk, looking miserable. “I messed up dad, I did not renew my I20, and it’s not valid for me to enter the US…” He continued to explain that while he had now initiated the process (at around 6 pm and he was scheduled to fly out at 6 am the next morning) the reply he got said that due to a long weekend, we should allow up to 5 working days for the renewal to be processed.

We had three options, cancel his flight and rebook it 5 days down the road, or put him on the flight and hope that the form came before he landed. The last option was that he could risk entering without a valid 120 and if lucky would get another form that allowed him temporary entry, but he could as easily be denied entry and asked to come back to India. After a bit of discussion, we decided that the expensive option of a last-minute flight change was probably the most prudent. Two hours later we had a new flight ticket and my bank balance was considerably lower. Three hours later the renewed 120 forms hit his inbox!! He could have easily made his flight, but we had no way of knowing that in advance.

The gift of 5 special days with him. This is all that we chose to focus on. Because of the last-minute change in plans, we got 5 wonderful days together. Many memories were made. A lovely long walk at Sultanpur National Park on a fog-shrouded Sunday morning. A lunch at ‘Under The Neem’. A drink at Soi7 followed by dinner in VietNom. A visit to the Saturday market at Horizon Centre. A movie marathon where we watched Top Gun Mavericks and rewatched the original Top Gun. In the midst of all of this, we reconnected at so many levels. The serendipity and unplanned nature of these 5 extra days somehow helped us ease back into familiar places with each other, which we had forgotten how to access. Till this point our holiday ticked all the boxes and then like a runner who thought they had nothing left in them suddenly finds a second wind, we broke free. Free of structure, free of trying to fit stuff in, just enjoying the moment and realising how easy it is for things to change in a second. I am grateful for the time that we spent with each other.

There were so many other meanings that we could have given to this I20 episode. My son was beating himself up for being “irresponsible” – we could have beat that drum longer and louder. It was a pretty expensive affair in a month where expenditure was already at an all-time high for various reasons. We could have spent more time on the spending aspect of this adventure. Does the meaning we give things that happen, give life to the days of our lives or does the experience bring meaning? There was a blizzard and heavy snow on the day he was originally supposed to land in Chicago. Does this mean his change of flight plan was meant to save him from that? The mind works in so many ways to make meaning from everyday events. What if those 5 days were not happy ones? What if we fought? What if….

I feel the truth lies below the surface. An anxious mind is the author of anxious actions. A peaceful mind is the author of peaceful actions. An angry mind is the scriptwriter of an angry movie and a happy mind, is the writer of a happy novel. Helping my mind process the significance of an invalid travel document and taking the necessary actions to reschedule his flight was just the first step. My choice to see this as a gift of additional time was the catalyst that brought me alive for the next 5 days. That helped shape them and allow them to become cherished memories.

Linking this thought to the world of PR, this is exactly where I see the power of our profession. We can and must catalyse behaviour that helps shape the reputation of the brands and companies that we work for. We have to lead by example. To be the author of action and help frame narratives, is the bread-and-butter work of a Public Relations professional and to do this well we need to always be mindful of our ethical and moral responsibilities. We are the custodians of image, the fathers and mothers who must take care of the brand and keep an eye on the bigger picture. Not just this quarter’s targets, but the lifelong value of a well nurtured reputation. When we have this perspective, it is easy to see the value of 5 extra days as opposed to the exorbitant price of a last-minute ticket change.

The pictures we help paint and frame are the images that imprint minds. Things happen and we have to respond to them, or we make things happen – and then we as PR practitioners help give them meaning and this special gift that we have, to help craft and shape a narrative, is what makes our profession powerful and meaningful.


The views and opinions published here belong to the author and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the publisher.

Nikhil Dey
Nikhil Dey is Executive Director, Adfactors PR.

A trusted coaching and communications professional, Nikhil Dey is a certified life and leadership coach (International Coach Federation - ICF). Nurturing talent and helping clients achieve their goals is what makes him happy. He loves learning from students of communication, teaching courses and guest lecturing at various educational institutions. When he is not working you will find him on the tennis court or out for long walks with his family and four legged friends.

Previously he has held senior leadership positions at Weber Shandwick and Genesis BCW.

He can be reached on twitter @deydreaming

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