Avril Quadros, a talented singer, author and founder of a wellness company – Avril’ Qs’, brings the concept of mindfulness and happiness to life. She speaks to Sameera Fernandes on how important it is to align the body, mind and soul with our life’s purpose and meaning.
As a first time author, you wrote a book in 14 days all centered around fear. Tell us what inspired you to go ahead with this topic?
Each of us is bound by a certain type of fear in one way or the other. The global pandemic has engulfed people negatively and this energy transforms into fear in one form or the other. I had certain fears about writing a book and hence embarked on this journey head on and it has been a great experience both personally and professionally.
What are some of the common fears that people need to address nowadays and what are some of the steps to overcome these fears
Most of us are unaware that we may be consumed by the fear of abandonment, unworthiness, being unacknowledged, unpurposeful, inauthentic, rejection and non-conformity. Addressing these fears will help us be strong, fierce, driven, kind, intelligent, compassionate and vulnerable among other beautiful qualities.
The book ‘You Should Be Scared’ highlights how 7 key fears can set you free. Please share key areas on how we can better ourselves.
Always remember, we are perfect with our imperfections for they make us who we are. Take time to go on a journey of self-discovery. Indulge in positive talk. Look at yourself in the mirror and see yourself for who you are. Fake it until you make it. Make sure you always celebrate your successes. Praise yourself and count on yourself so that you are not dependent on people for their love and support.
At 15, although you were a confident high achiever both in academics and extracurricular activities, you still felt the need for people to validate you. Please advice how we can address the fear of unworthiness and being unacknowledged?
When we shed our inhibitions and get comfortable with making mistakes as parents, our children shed their inhibitions too. All learnt fears develop into lifelong fears, insecurities and even phobias, ranging from lack of self-confidence to even phobias and delusions. Developing a spiritual relationship with yourself and forgiving those who have hurt you will make you a more successful and confident person.
Who and what has inspired you to be who you are today?
American poet, memoirist and civil rights activist Maya Angelou has impacted my life so deeply with her work. Rumi is my favourite poet and he has helped me deconstruct fear with the tool of love and has eloquently brought out the relationship between fear, forgiveness, love and compassion.
How do you harness the power of fear? How do we address such situations of mudslinging and false accusations?
Attacking someone’s character and maligning someone’s name is a form of a violence too. Of late, we come across lot of people especially in the media who are blamed and accused of allegations who may in reality not have committed the alleged offence or be guilty of the offence framed against them. It is important to have understanding that the person who is accusing you is flawed in their own mind and heart and there is an insecurity which drives them to do what they do because they have a hidden agenda. This person is a victim of their own delusions. Once you understand that, you will be able to navigate through that. You can clear your name in a civilised way without mudslinging and maybe even hand over victory to that person. On a broader stage, you can be gracious enough to take it offline and not do it in public. The Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu says the same thing- ‘Forgive the person but not the offence’.
You have been courageous and have handled an audience of over 30,000 people. How have you managed to transcend all barriers?
Once we understand that everything is transient and nothing is permanent in life, that itself spells success. This automatically ensures that when we have a position of power, we enjoy it with responsibility and integrity. People take advantage of their position and power because they know that both of these are valid only for a short window of time.
We need to always remember that the only constant in life is ‘change’. The ‘legacy’ we leave behind itself is most important. Although it is simple to understand, the only way to move forward and cut across these barriers is through action.
What is the message to the young leaders of today?
Examine your purpose and ask yourself if this is your true calling. Also, think about what you would like to contribute to the community. It has to be something unique and authentic. Be non-judgmental and loving with yourself as this will help with course correcting your life and living with purpose and passion and you will be able to contribute to the people who have chosen you as their leader with greater sense of benefitting them for the highest good of all concerned.
The views and opinions published here belong to the interviewer and the interviewee and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the publisher.